Been busy revamping the site completely, so I haven't really had the time to write a new entry, which is a shame. Hopefully I'll be able to implement a theme switcher at some point since I like all the different colours I have on each page, but think they'd work better as uniform site-wide themes. Outside of website stuff, uni's just about to start up, which honestly is a little devastating. Sometimes I can't believe that I have to pay to do these units, considering how utterly soul-sucking they are. Honestly though, I'm glad that they're so boring; it really helps me appreciate my hobbies and try to pursue them instead of doomscrolling all day.

Speaking of that, Lent has been going okay. I've decided to give up reels and headphone usage, which to me is a lethal combination. I won't lie and say that I haven't felt some cravings, but I think this has been a net positive in my life. I think my ears are pretty happy with my decision to free them from my headphones. I'm ngl, I sort of think I've been damaging them too much. I've been thinking of learning how to draw to give my hands something to do other than flip pages or scroll, and I'm still considering getting back into writing too. We'll see about that.

I don't get how this month passed so quickly yet so incredibly slowly at the same time. To be frank, this hasn't been the best start to the year for me, but maybe I'm just being pessimistic. After all, it's up to me to stop procrastinating on my work and not replying to messages, not the responsibility of anyone else. I guess I should look for tips especially on how to respond to messages without feeling like I'm about to have a heart attack. Should I try and find a pen pal? Is that still a thing? Idk, all I know is that I'm tired of wallowing in self-pity, so I'm going to do something about it. I need to figure out where to start though; that's probably the hardest thing to do.

On the bright side, I've started playing Tomodachi Life and I'm having lots of fun with it. Also, I got my tote bag back :)

Finally decided to break up with my boyfriend today. I know it was the right thing to do, but I still feel sad. Like I know that he wasn't right for me; he was the person who had shown me that gore video, not to mention the time he tried to force me to watch the Charlie Kirk shooting video, even after I explicitly refused multiple times. That among other things made it very clear to me that it wasn't going to last. But idk, it kind of just feels like that was my only chance and I blew it. He was really sweet when we first met too. I hope I made the right decision.

Also he still has my tote bag :(

I've been thinking of picking up writing again. I used to do it a ton when I was younger, and it'd give me something to do other than going on reels. I desperately want to lessen the amount of time I spend on reels, especially after having come across a real gore video that deeply disturbed me and honestly still does a week later. Hopefully writing will help fix my attention span and bring back the creativity I used to have. I figure I should stop being so afraid of what others think of me and really put myself out there!

Other than that, I should definitely start practicing the flute again. I've been super lazy about that for years now, and flutes are expensive! I want to actually use it instead of leaving it to gather dust in its case. I could use some suggestions for what pieces to practice, though.

After fiddling with html and css, I've finally come up with a little layout to start a blog! Because I've had internet safety rules hammered into my head since I first accessed a computer lab in primary school, I won't be sharing super personal info. Instead, I'll just ramble about my thoughts and vaguely share things that have happened in my life.

For my first post, I'll talk about my Christmas! I had a super relaxing day, since I mainly celebrate on Christmas Eve, so I don't have anything interesting to note (Just got attacked by a moth while writing this, idk how they get inside but they're so annoying).

Christmas is the best time for me to reflect on the many blessings I have in my life. It's hard to stay grateful sometimes, so it's nice to have some reminders of how lucky I am every now and then. It's also a comforting reminder of the love that God has for us, to send His Son to Earth for all of us. Not to be a cornball, but I'm certainly grateful for that, and for all my loved ones, friends, and people who have been so kind to me online.

I think that should be enough for a first post. I really need to learn what to write about in a blog lmao